Open any tabloid today. Any one. Go on. What will you see?
Celebrities, hooking up, immediately after a break-up. Kim
Kardashian is into Kanye West suddenly, after her just as sudden divorce (post
a marriage that lasted 72 days); Ashton Kutcher, fresh from his split with Demi
Moore, is allegedly living-in with Mila Kunis, the petite hot brunette from
‘Friends With Benefits’ and ‘Black Swan’.
How do they do it? How do they fall in love immediately
after a break-up? Or rather why? How do they start a new relationship right
after the old one goes kaput? Well, it is because it is one of the best ways to
get over a heartbreak. Nothing else works as well. When you find someone that
you like to be with right after a painful break-up, this new person helps you
forget the pain, makes you feel better, comforted. It’s similar to being stuck
in a hailstorm and then coming home to a fireplace and blanket.
After a break-up you find yourself disoriented, unstable.
You might find yourself breaking down all of a sudden; find yourself getting
emotional for the most trivial of things. A new person in your life brings with
him/her stability, a much needed support, like a crutch when you have had a
fracture. He/she boosts your confidence, your self-esteem to where it
originally was, makes you happy and keeps you from doing stupid things like
calling your ex after getting drunk. Falling in love right away will plug the
holes and keep them from leaking.
And what if this person is the original Mr/Ms Right? What if
the lessons you learned from past relationship actually help you in choosing the
right partner this time around? It can happen. Your internal radar may actually
lead you the perfect partner. So, go with your instinct. Just like with every
relationship, don’t overanalyse. Give it time to simmer, let the colour show.
Seeing someone new right after a heartbreak is a great idea.
However, make sure you take a little time off in between, like taking a break
after an injury. You need some time to heal, to get back to full health, some
time for yourself, to take a breather, to reflect on how the last one went and
how you want the future one to go. Eventually, you will need to take some time
off to resolve past relationship issues, gain some closure. When you do feel
sad or hurt because of your past romance, don’t take it out on your present partner.
Instead, discuss it with him/her. Be open about how you’re feeling. Remember,
it’s not them, it’s you.
All in all, falling in love immediately is a wonderful
thing, but just make sure you set the pace for the relationship – a pace where
you don’t feel too rushed, and make sure it isn’t a rebound. So, go forth, get
over the pain with a new, fresh start.
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